Posts87

I knew it was danny’s last night in town. I wanted to make it special. It was his idea to go see a play at a fancy theater. My dad was a douchebag about some issues. Trust me I still got away with murder. He was old fashioned about making me wait until I was sixteen to have my first real date. I hated him for that shit. I was not your average k**. I had a huge secret. Right after I turned f******n my dad got me a job at the restaurant where he worked. It was all kinds of i*****l and corrupt. People thought I was a slacker in my advanced classes. Nearly every weeknight I worked from… Read more

It’s time to play hard. Last night I got caught up in a fit of rage. I introduced the group of boys known as ‘the losers.’ Brent was a tall dork with a bad haircut and raging teenage acne. In his memory I was not girlfriend material. He hadn’t dated a girl and he was a sophomore. I entered the equation as a delinquent freshman pretending to be innocent. Another night I will tell you the story of devious behavior before I was a freshman. How I lost my virginity is a totally different story. Being in the gifted program I developed a double life. All of my academic peers were wealthy, w… Read more

When I got back to the party I started drinking hard. It was the uncomfortable tension from brent’s brother. All I could do was look at his cum stain and feel defeated. When a boy you really like snarls at you after cumming in his pants you feel busted. One thing all those boys can agree on is that I’m damn good fun at a party. I don’t know why we went in my friend’s parent’s room. Someone pointed at this thing on the dresser and said ‘what is that?’ I picked it up and started playing with it. I assumed it was some Tupperware device. I was the only chick at this party. Some dude had… Read more

I have played this game before. I dated a man who loved facebook and refused to read my blog. I love to gamble. I discussed all his damn business and flaws. All he had to do was read it. It was a test to give brent my password. I love him dearly. He could invest time in me and find out my secrets. I simply know he won’t do it. I was so tired this morning. He sent me a skype message that said ‘I could really use a friend to talk to.’ I would stop anything and respond to his message. Love is a strange thing. He announced he was getting divorced. When he told me why I wanted to… Read more

I always post profiles when I change them. I tried this approach and it failed. Trying something totally different must happen. Day 200. The next profile. My name is linmarris. I'm thirty two. I have no husband or previous marriages and I can't have c***dren. That is why I have the free time to play on a porn site. I have medical issues. I'm severely bi-polar and I'm fighting to get disability. I truly can't work a normal job and I must run a small business from my home Above all things I am a writer and an artist. My blog is brand new on this forum. Through writing it I have found… Read more

It is morning now. I have been in a shitty mood. I have to change the way I write. I love the movie 'gentlemen prefer blondes.' If you read my brainstorm vomit blogs you understand my infatuation with marilyn monroe. I think about my transformation. I remember the scene when she looks sexy, sounds sexy and acts sexy to manipulate a rich man for his diamonds. I can play the game. It's been a lonely night. Brent called me on skype. I need his damn help. He is smarter than me. I gave him my password so he could sign on and read my work. He is such a slacker. I even told him 'I don't th… Read more

I swear I just had an 'oh how i love god' moment. This whole night has been an exercise in battling sleep deprivation. With no medicine sleep can't happen. I have gone a bit loopy. I hate this situation. I didn't plan to write an epic long blog before I posted the letter to dave. The damn mania makes my grammar wretched. I am rebellious and not writing on word. It is an act of mediocre defiance. When you go a bit crazy you do strange things. I forced myself to read that last blog. It was so amateur. I can do better. I saw so many flaws. I wanted to take it down. I have trouble re… Read more

This blog is going to piss me off. This is me raw, unedited and under stress. I do write straight stream-of-consciousness. That means I do not finish stories. I get lost in tangents. I didn't plan this as a blog. I must say dave is basically my boyfriend. I even mention so many other men I deeply care about. Dave is different. Our schedules keep us in contact. A troll declared my friends 'muppets.' I kind of like it. Wolfrider knows what a dear friend he has become. My teddybear and i have a huge bond. I would date all three of them if distance wasn't an issue. Dave is not terri… Read more

Re: The Kind of Woman I Want To Fuck blog >>>>> billwould described it perfectly. Hypersexuality is an aura you can't miss. It'll make you stop dead in your tracks, turn your head so fast you'll get dizzy, and make you wanna fuck till the sun comes up. For me it's the way my man smells. Clean or straight home from work, when I lean in for a hug, which leads to a kiss, which.... Oh shit! Where was I? Yes, his "aura" makes me feel completely at a loss of any strength I may have on my own. The only man to ever do that to me without lifting a finger. It may be a chemical reaction of some kind.… Read more

Dear bri, all I wanted to do was write a private pm about what I am facing. My internet wont work and I don’t have the stamina to fight the cable company and have it re-set. I guess this is god’s way of saying this should be a blog. I have been in a deep depression. I was in denial. I couldn’t face my biggest fear and I blamed the problem on a lack of support. I didn’t want to tell anyone what I was facing. I sucked it up and wrote some important people in my life a warning. I couldn’t tell my female best friend. It would hurt too bad. My depression was so deep I wrote one of my… Read more

Have no fear. I will go back to writing erotica. I have been writing about my real life this week. I got attacked by a troll in a skirt who has an obsession with rotten smelling pussy. It started when he said I had the most boring profile on xhamster. It cracked me up since I have hundreds of photos of myself and my artwork. I also write a daily blog when I have medicine. Very few men and women read it on a consistent basis. I write for three men. My teddybear, wolfrider and dave. When you have three amazing men you are complete. I welcome new friends to leave a comment and enter… Read more

My dearest dave, we have chatted all night and now you understand the way i speak. You are right. I am loyal. There is nothing I wouldn't do for the people I love. I am the girl who jumps in front of bullets before considering the consequences. My whole life has revolved around being good and helping people. Yet I am no saint. I have a temper. I make rash decisions. I call them my two second moments. In two seconds I can make a radical change that alters everything. Sometimes that kind of quick thinking is needed. However, most of my two second decisions are a mistake. It's fifty-… Read more

Jesus fucking Christ I am tired but I swore to write this fucking blog. It is my mission to write a blog daily for as long as I have medicine. More than you can imagine I wanted to sign off xhamster and go to word and write some kinky fucking lesbian erotica. Tonight was more complicated. I spent nearly an hour writing my best friend. She is my world. She is very shy and modest but I’m trying to convince her to set up an xhamster profile. She is also an excellent writer. She is a beautiful bbw who can take photos of herself where she looks like a damn model. The friends I have mad… Read more

I have never really been attracted to women. However, my new Alison mosshart obsession has me thinking more and more about what it would be like to be with a woman. I only met one woman in real life I truly wanted to fuck. I will write a fictional story about doing it. Usually I write the truth behind the fiction after I write erotica. This time it has to come first. I have to tell you about bobbi. I spent nearly ten years working at different dry cleaners. If you are ever curious about what happens at the cleaners just ask. It is hard work when you are at the plant. Most cleaner… Read more

He’s been dead f******n years. It doesn’t get easier. Over time you forget a person’s failures and only remember the sound of their voice. Especially if they are laughing. The sound of my father’s laughter will always be with me. He is still around. You can feel him sometimes. No one warns you that the dead can visit. No one warns you that you can create a false memory. That is where I am shaken. I created fiction to cover up the horror. I had to break my mother’s heart and she had to break mine. On car rides we talk about what we lived through. It is hard to imagine we made i… Read more

All pm messages are on hold. I really suck at chatting. I have so many ‘hey baby’ ‘nice tits’ ‘watch me cum’ bullshit that I give up. You can reach me through a blog comment or a page comment. If you want to speak in private all you have to do is send me a pm to check your message. That system works because I can hit the pm button under your avatar and not scroll through hundreds of demeaning nonsense to find your post. If you send me a page comment to check your message and all you say is High I will curse you like a dog. My method works as long as the men who do send valid message… Read more

All three of us damn near lost our minds those two weeks before prom night. It seemed like an eternity. It was so utterly strange we truly gave each other all a free pass to fuck who we wanted when we wanted to do it. Scott blamed his busted up face in a bar fight. I have to say I am a deviant little bitch but when I looked at that busted lip I nearly begged him to fuck me. Jason went on a fucking marathon that made town legend. He fucked the strawberry festival queen, two of her runner’s up. He fucked the homecoming queen. Hot girls lined up around the block. I love him for his… Read more

{Not my work, s friends beautiful gift for me to share)Slowly walking in the forest, trying to find inner peace, late in the day, darkness slowly advancing, just barely creeping, the loss of my loved oneshas my heart weeping. Deep in the forest I roam, so jo one can hear my agonizing groans, barely seeing the pathmy feet follow with steps oh so light, from the treetops down float beams of moon light. Suddenly I freeze im standing in the place that has called to my heart, for in the clearing I see a circle of stones not far apart, the treesarch high overhead of me, I am not at ease, not a so… Read more

The next day Jason saw me he knew something happened. He bombarded me with questions. I stuck with my flu story. He sort of busted me in a lie when I couldn’t produce a doctor’s note to retake the test without ten points taken off. All day long he kept saying ‘why would you lie to me.’ I knew he wouldn’t drop it. This boy would hound me until death to know why I skipped school on my eighteenth birthday. I lied my ass off and I’ll probably go to hell. I picked out one of our mutual friends who we both knew had a bad news boyfriend. I told him it was a personal female problem. He w… Read more

I’ve been writing for hours. I plunged in deep to ‘bullshit mountain.’ I accidentally deleted it all. I always say things are deleted so you can write them better. I had my former friend read my newer writing and she confirmed my suspicions I became a better writer. Maybe every writer needs to write non-stop for a year to produce a bad manuscript to hone his craft. I did it. One day when I was reading the newsfeed on facebook it hit me that everyone was fake. Facebook was like their kitchen window covered with plaid d****s. In reality they all cook tv dinners and take pictures of… Read more