Embarrassing Episodes
These are some true embarrassing moments Iāve had over the years. Iāll add more if they come to mind. If youāve experienced any good ones, please tell it in a comment.
1. It was 1960. I was in my first year at high school and joined the swimming team which practiced at the local YMCA. Bathing suits were not allowed. I was in the final leg of a 100-yard freestyle when I started to get this strange sensation between my legs. The more I kicked my legs, the more intense it got. When I reached the end of the lane and climbed out, my pubescent cock was hard and squirting this white liquid. My coach, who was also naked, noticed and gave me a strange nod. I donāt think any of my teammates saw. I was embarrassed and bolted for the shower. This was the first time in my life that I came off.
2. I love to masturbate: always have, always will. This addiction added greatly to the failure of 2 marriages. For some reason, both wives didnāt like the idea that I preferred beating my meat to having sex with them. Anyway, the menās room stalls where I worked had shiny black walls that were like mirrors and black tile floors. Once or twice a week, Iād go into one and stroke. Seeing the reflection of my big cock and a nice cumshot was a big turn on.
One day, I had been stroking for about 10 minutes and shot a large wad on the floor. When I bent to wipe it up with toilet paper, I saw there was somebody in the next stall. How had I missed this? I was starting to freak out when this stream of white goo landed on the floor just under the partition. Seems he was there for the same reason as me. Thank god! I got out of there as quickly as possible. I had my suspicions but never totally figured out who my stall neighbor was. I stopped jerking off in the menās room realizing that the risks were just too great.
3. When the disastrous Windows 10 first came out, Internet Explorer was very unpredictable. Sometimes pages from your browsing history would just pop up. My son and daughter-in-law were visiting me one day. Without asking, she went on to my computer to do something. We heard this shriek and went running. I had been watching pissing porn videos and sure enough, one popped up and started playing all by it self. I made all kinds of excuses about viruses, hacking, malware, etc. I donāt think they bought it and sheās never done it since. It couldn't happen again now because I bought a Mac the next day and threw Windows 10 in the dumpster.
4. I went to an AMP in Miami and convinced the girl, Lulu, to let me fuck her. After paying a $100 tip, she put a condom on me. Thinking it was a bit dry, I got off the table to lube it up. Unfortunately, I used alcohol by mistake instead of massage oil. It felt fine to me because of the rubber but when I plunged into Lulu she jumped about 10 feet in the air. She ran naked from the room and came back in a few minutes. She said her pussy was irritated and gave me a great blow job, with rimming, in lieu of the fucked-up fuck. When it was over, she laughed about it. I felt bad, though, and slipped her an extra $20.
5. I went into my Amazon.com wishlist the other day which contains a lot of dildos and masturbation devices. I clicked on an item (not sexual) and "WTF", it said someone had bought it for me. I know that my same daughter-in-law accessed the list by just entering my email address! I discovered anyone can do this unless you take it upon yourself to mark the list "Private". Anyway, my son's wife, who already considers me a pervert, now knows I'm interested in Doc Johnson's Squirting 12 inch Penis. Maybe, she'll buy it for me next year or better still, buy it for herself.
6. I met this tough lush in a local bar one night and, after last call, she came back to my place. She was absolutely the worst fuck I ever had. Jack-hammer pounding with a****l sounds all the way. The blow job was no better and actually hurt. I couldn't stay hard and finally convinced her to stop. When I jacked off, she again attacked my dick to swallow the cum. Thank god it was over and we went to sleep.
The next morning, she can't find her false teeth! I didn't even know she used them but it did explain the painful blow job. We looked everywhere over and over and finally gave up. It ended up costing her about $500 and remained a mystery. I didn't offer to help as I never wanted to see her again. About 6 months later, I was changing the bed and felt something stuck under the mattress pad, behind the headboard. Yep, it was the gompers. I got them back to her so she'd have a spare set if it ever happens to her again.
1. It was 1960. I was in my first year at high school and joined the swimming team which practiced at the local YMCA. Bathing suits were not allowed. I was in the final leg of a 100-yard freestyle when I started to get this strange sensation between my legs. The more I kicked my legs, the more intense it got. When I reached the end of the lane and climbed out, my pubescent cock was hard and squirting this white liquid. My coach, who was also naked, noticed and gave me a strange nod. I donāt think any of my teammates saw. I was embarrassed and bolted for the shower. This was the first time in my life that I came off.
2. I love to masturbate: always have, always will. This addiction added greatly to the failure of 2 marriages. For some reason, both wives didnāt like the idea that I preferred beating my meat to having sex with them. Anyway, the menās room stalls where I worked had shiny black walls that were like mirrors and black tile floors. Once or twice a week, Iād go into one and stroke. Seeing the reflection of my big cock and a nice cumshot was a big turn on.
One day, I had been stroking for about 10 minutes and shot a large wad on the floor. When I bent to wipe it up with toilet paper, I saw there was somebody in the next stall. How had I missed this? I was starting to freak out when this stream of white goo landed on the floor just under the partition. Seems he was there for the same reason as me. Thank god! I got out of there as quickly as possible. I had my suspicions but never totally figured out who my stall neighbor was. I stopped jerking off in the menās room realizing that the risks were just too great.
3. When the disastrous Windows 10 first came out, Internet Explorer was very unpredictable. Sometimes pages from your browsing history would just pop up. My son and daughter-in-law were visiting me one day. Without asking, she went on to my computer to do something. We heard this shriek and went running. I had been watching pissing porn videos and sure enough, one popped up and started playing all by it self. I made all kinds of excuses about viruses, hacking, malware, etc. I donāt think they bought it and sheās never done it since. It couldn't happen again now because I bought a Mac the next day and threw Windows 10 in the dumpster.
4. I went to an AMP in Miami and convinced the girl, Lulu, to let me fuck her. After paying a $100 tip, she put a condom on me. Thinking it was a bit dry, I got off the table to lube it up. Unfortunately, I used alcohol by mistake instead of massage oil. It felt fine to me because of the rubber but when I plunged into Lulu she jumped about 10 feet in the air. She ran naked from the room and came back in a few minutes. She said her pussy was irritated and gave me a great blow job, with rimming, in lieu of the fucked-up fuck. When it was over, she laughed about it. I felt bad, though, and slipped her an extra $20.
5. I went into my Amazon.com wishlist the other day which contains a lot of dildos and masturbation devices. I clicked on an item (not sexual) and "WTF", it said someone had bought it for me. I know that my same daughter-in-law accessed the list by just entering my email address! I discovered anyone can do this unless you take it upon yourself to mark the list "Private". Anyway, my son's wife, who already considers me a pervert, now knows I'm interested in Doc Johnson's Squirting 12 inch Penis. Maybe, she'll buy it for me next year or better still, buy it for herself.
6. I met this tough lush in a local bar one night and, after last call, she came back to my place. She was absolutely the worst fuck I ever had. Jack-hammer pounding with a****l sounds all the way. The blow job was no better and actually hurt. I couldn't stay hard and finally convinced her to stop. When I jacked off, she again attacked my dick to swallow the cum. Thank god it was over and we went to sleep.
The next morning, she can't find her false teeth! I didn't even know she used them but it did explain the painful blow job. We looked everywhere over and over and finally gave up. It ended up costing her about $500 and remained a mystery. I didn't offer to help as I never wanted to see her again. About 6 months later, I was changing the bed and felt something stuck under the mattress pad, behind the headboard. Yep, it was the gompers. I got them back to her so she'd have a spare set if it ever happens to her again.
8 years ago
