Just a list of FAQS received:
I thought I would share the list of frequestion asked question I have received over the 9 years I have been on this website and my quick responses to them:
FAQs ..............PLEASE READ !!!!!!!!!!!!
Q1. Do you have Skype, MSN, Yahoo, AOL, BSKYB, BBC, ITV, Fox News Network or anything else?
A. I have Yahoo Messenger but I will only chat on here, thanks!!!
Q2. Can you talk dirty to me?
A. Garbage, rubbish, recycle, crap, unclean, soiled, carbon footprint, Covid-19 and finally filthy.
Now, did you manage to shoot your man-porridge all over your keyboard based on the dirty filthy talk above?
Q3. Will you supply me with photos because "I'm sure there are no nude photos of any women on this site or any other website on the world wide web"?
A. NO! I don't supply Photo Harvesters, Use the camera on your expensive phone to take some 'happy snaps' of your partner. You know you want to.... and she will be grateful in knowing you are sharing them with no-named random blokes.
Q4. Are you interested in cam to cam?
A. Nope. What's the point in supplying lazy men with viral sex. Camming is as about as pointless as me giving a soapy tit wank to a guy with a two inch penis, I don't get any benefit from either activity.
Q5. Do you want to see my cock on cam?
A. Nope. Ask your wife, girlfriend, lover, mistress or boyfriend or go and and flash on a motorway verge, train platform or outside a Police Station!
Q6. Do you like my cock pictures?
A. I'm not interested in your cock pictures. What's the point? Apart from a really lame attempt to boost your already low ego! When you could in fact achieve positive comments if you asked your Mum.
Q7. I have a 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 cm penis, so what do you think?
A. Nothing. Ask your partner. If you don't have a partner then the realisation should suddenly hit you that there is more to attraction than inches or indeed centimetres.
Q8. Would you like to Skype with me?
A. NO! I don't own Skype, try the phone sex sites on the web, the 'LIVE SEX@ section found on the black menu above and have your bank account & credit card details ready!!
Q9. Will you meet me as a single guy?
A. Nope, did that once, it was 10 mins of rather ordinary sex and 3 hours of inane chatter over tea and biscuits about why his wife doesn't understand him. Try the local women in your area or interupt your wife who is busy making your house into a family home.
Q10. My wife/girlfriend (who trusts me) was....
(1) Involved in a seven car pile up and is in hospital for 3 months...
(2) Has gone to her mum's funeral and to make arrangements, plus consol her grieving father and is away for 3 weeks
(3) Is due to give birth next week with likely complications...
(4) Has been told she has terminal cancer with only 4 weeks to live or...
(5) Has given me the c***dren that i wanted to continue my legacy and is far too tired due to all the required effort to bring them up correctly, not that I would know due to my lack of input...
(6) Has told me I'm crap in bed, my body stinks, that my cock smells of Brie and she goes up to bed before I do and pretends to be asleep...
(7) Uses the fact that she has gone through the menopause to finally stop me from jumping on her for sex because to be frank, she doesn't think you're that good at it. YOU believe the menopause excuse despite their being an abundance of porn featuring women over 50...
"Damn it I married the dumb bitch and bought her flowers 8 years ago. I'm pissed off she isn't considerate enough to be here and take care of ME!!!'
So.....
Will you meet me for sex, because evidently you are that sort who would fuck anyone?
A. NO! I would fuck anyone, but NOT you...
Q11. I'm from a far-off land (which has a reputation for treating women as third class citizens)and "I want you to fly over to my country or travel up north to places like Bradford/Oldham/Newham or any other grooming areas at your expense to meet me and so I can worship you for the first 24 hours then put you to work for the next 24 years".
A. Mmmm. Get real......No thanks!!!
Q12. You inform me that you are neither Gay or a Bi (in fact you think "those" sort of deviants should burn in hell), but you want me to use a strap-on on you for 'pegging'. "Will you help me with something my Mosque-going wife won't do?" you ask.
A. As long as I can do it in front your business friends and the local towns people in the middle of your local bar/pub/club. The local newspaper reporter must be attendance. You have to be wearing one of your wife's frumpy dresses and her unfashionable make-up. I'm warning you I'm not going to use any lubricants, not even crunchy peanut butter. You better not whimper sissy-boi as I have invited your parents to see you getting some sense 'put' into you.
Gosh, I see you're not able to stifle your STIFFY at this point. Oh dear...Epic fail on my part.
FAQs ..............PLEASE READ !!!!!!!!!!!!
Q1. Do you have Skype, MSN, Yahoo, AOL, BSKYB, BBC, ITV, Fox News Network or anything else?
A. I have Yahoo Messenger but I will only chat on here, thanks!!!
Q2. Can you talk dirty to me?
A. Garbage, rubbish, recycle, crap, unclean, soiled, carbon footprint, Covid-19 and finally filthy.
Now, did you manage to shoot your man-porridge all over your keyboard based on the dirty filthy talk above?
Q3. Will you supply me with photos because "I'm sure there are no nude photos of any women on this site or any other website on the world wide web"?
A. NO! I don't supply Photo Harvesters, Use the camera on your expensive phone to take some 'happy snaps' of your partner. You know you want to.... and she will be grateful in knowing you are sharing them with no-named random blokes.
Q4. Are you interested in cam to cam?
A. Nope. What's the point in supplying lazy men with viral sex. Camming is as about as pointless as me giving a soapy tit wank to a guy with a two inch penis, I don't get any benefit from either activity.
Q5. Do you want to see my cock on cam?
A. Nope. Ask your wife, girlfriend, lover, mistress or boyfriend or go and and flash on a motorway verge, train platform or outside a Police Station!
Q6. Do you like my cock pictures?
A. I'm not interested in your cock pictures. What's the point? Apart from a really lame attempt to boost your already low ego! When you could in fact achieve positive comments if you asked your Mum.
Q7. I have a 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 cm penis, so what do you think?
A. Nothing. Ask your partner. If you don't have a partner then the realisation should suddenly hit you that there is more to attraction than inches or indeed centimetres.
Q8. Would you like to Skype with me?
A. NO! I don't own Skype, try the phone sex sites on the web, the 'LIVE SEX@ section found on the black menu above and have your bank account & credit card details ready!!
Q9. Will you meet me as a single guy?
A. Nope, did that once, it was 10 mins of rather ordinary sex and 3 hours of inane chatter over tea and biscuits about why his wife doesn't understand him. Try the local women in your area or interupt your wife who is busy making your house into a family home.
Q10. My wife/girlfriend (who trusts me) was....
(1) Involved in a seven car pile up and is in hospital for 3 months...
(2) Has gone to her mum's funeral and to make arrangements, plus consol her grieving father and is away for 3 weeks
(3) Is due to give birth next week with likely complications...
(4) Has been told she has terminal cancer with only 4 weeks to live or...
(5) Has given me the c***dren that i wanted to continue my legacy and is far too tired due to all the required effort to bring them up correctly, not that I would know due to my lack of input...
(6) Has told me I'm crap in bed, my body stinks, that my cock smells of Brie and she goes up to bed before I do and pretends to be asleep...
(7) Uses the fact that she has gone through the menopause to finally stop me from jumping on her for sex because to be frank, she doesn't think you're that good at it. YOU believe the menopause excuse despite their being an abundance of porn featuring women over 50...
"Damn it I married the dumb bitch and bought her flowers 8 years ago. I'm pissed off she isn't considerate enough to be here and take care of ME!!!'
So.....
Will you meet me for sex, because evidently you are that sort who would fuck anyone?
A. NO! I would fuck anyone, but NOT you...
Q11. I'm from a far-off land (which has a reputation for treating women as third class citizens)and "I want you to fly over to my country or travel up north to places like Bradford/Oldham/Newham or any other grooming areas at your expense to meet me and so I can worship you for the first 24 hours then put you to work for the next 24 years".
A. Mmmm. Get real......No thanks!!!
Q12. You inform me that you are neither Gay or a Bi (in fact you think "those" sort of deviants should burn in hell), but you want me to use a strap-on on you for 'pegging'. "Will you help me with something my Mosque-going wife won't do?" you ask.
A. As long as I can do it in front your business friends and the local towns people in the middle of your local bar/pub/club. The local newspaper reporter must be attendance. You have to be wearing one of your wife's frumpy dresses and her unfashionable make-up. I'm warning you I'm not going to use any lubricants, not even crunchy peanut butter. You better not whimper sissy-boi as I have invited your parents to see you getting some sense 'put' into you.
Gosh, I see you're not able to stifle your STIFFY at this point. Oh dear...Epic fail on my part.
4 years ago
