Dec 2019 - What went wrong?

User sloohand51 asked: "tell us more details about the process from first experience with M, to her running off with a bull? Im sure many of us would like to learn from the experience, even though its sad for you and we are all sorry about it. WHat would you do differently if anything? What was working? What was the point of no return? stuff like that?"

It's a long story and I don't write well, so this is the short version.

We were in the lifestyle 9 years together. I introduced her to it. She was young when we started, barely 20. Over time, we played more and more and things got more and more extreme. Not even a year into it, and she was fucking BBC every weekend, and sometimes during the week, too. I was fully enjoying and encouraging it.

Then, we met a bull and their chemistry was off the charts. Like nothing I'd seen. I could tell the first time they fucked that she was giving him some part of her that she didn't give to anyone else. I was jealous but it was a huge turn on. Best orgasms of my life hands down.

After that, she only wanted to fuck him, not other BBC. I was fine with that. Like I said, best orgasms ever for me and her. But one time he was fucking her and I was watching and he started ordering me to do stuff. Lick her pussy. Stroke his dick. I listened in the heat of the moment. It was a mistake. I didn't like the way I felt after. And I think she looked at me different after that. She started breaking our rules. Snuck around to see him without me there. Fucked him raw. When I found out I demanded she stop seeing him. She broke it off with him, but that was the beginning of the end for us. Months later we were filing for divorce.

Lessons learned for me
1) boundaries are key. When I could see she was falling in love, I should have asked her to stop seeing him instead of encouraging more of it.
2) I will never let a girl of mine fuck a steady BBC boyfriend. Change it up to avoid emotional attachment.
3) There's a difference between sharing your wife with a bull and submitting to a bull. Don't do the latter. She'll see you differently and it will change your dynamic. It did for my marriage anyway.

Happy to answer other questions.

Thanks.