Twisted mind

As I sit alone in the dark writing I have my mind twisted up with worry. How to help a person I care about? Yet to do so would betray her trust in me, want tohelp by buying art work yet would not be charity.
My friend is beautiful inside and out , that is no lie.
Just hanging out with her makes me feel high.
A woman that life gave a shit ton of lemonds to, oh what is she to do?
Making lemon-aid as fast as she possibly can , I offer a helping hand.
Proud she is to ask for help but I am at her side standing full of pride.
People often ask why, her love and friendship reaches the sky,
She has endured more than you know, but has an inner glowof peace that once you know her
you understand why all I can do is cry, watching her twist and turn from life's daily firestorm
praying she never gets burned.
My friend is very tenacious and proud yet has a feminine side that goes a mile wide, she has trouble knowing
as her friend I die every time I hear her cry, my mind is twisted up down to the core, dont know how to help and be bore.
I wont name my friend, I will be at her side to the very end not out of pity or shame my tears will fall like summers rain
they fall out of love and pride for my friend is having one hell of a ride.
Up and down the bumpy road she travels, thinking she is alone, out of the darkness comes a wolf holding a bone.
Sharing his love and care with her walking that dark bumpy road, each in their own mind mode.
For my friend take a minute and you will see what my mind is doing to me.

Published by wolfrider2121

10 years ago

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wolfrider2121 Publisher 10 years ago

to halinaplays : When you are in your darkest of dark periods just remember that you are loved by few good men, that stand by your side no matter what happens and we wait with bitten nails, lack of sleep, and ulcers from concerns about you my dear.
Lynns lemonade mmmmmmm what a concept for small business, freshly squeezed never bitter and sweet as you are dear. Never know how it may turn out, lemonade, and shakeups for fair time. Never know till we can do a business plan

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halinaplays 10 years ago

I am deeply touched and honored. You can't imagine how much I wish we lived closer. I know when I disappear in a dark depression the people I care about suffer almost as much as I do. In some ways that is why I try to keep myself isolated. It would be different if I only dealt with a normal strain of being bi-polar. I inherited a double dose from both of my parents. Each side of my family is deeply impacted by this genetic condition. Loving me to the moon and back would still not prevent me from bouts of depression that confide me to my bed. Not having insurance, not qualifying for medicaid and being denied disability leave me no safety net. People like me fall through the cracks at an astonishing rate. No one wants to believe the severity of my inherited condition is a problem that keeps me from working and having a normal life. You have read my story. I am a survivor. The battle I face will be the toughest obstacle I have ever faced. I will disappear. I will be too sedated to write coherent messages. I am simply grateful you don't have to watch me when I enter a state that causes disgust, revulsion, despair, pity and heartache. I will overcome this hurdle. It is a journey I face alone. I would rather keep my darkest moments hidden in order not to hurt the people I love. What challenges I face I choose to handle them with grace and not self-pity. Always remember the greatest asset of being bi-polar is that each depression snaps into mania. I assure you the euphoria I feel in a manic state makes the suffering I feel when I am depressed seem like child's play. I have talked with other people who have my condition. We share a secret. The mania we are blessed to receive is the greatest feeling any human could ever have. Never doubt that my tenacious spirit will ever be diminished. Life has taught me that mania truly gives me so many talents the world can barely keep up with all that I can accomplish. The coming months will be hard. I always rebound and enter a state that makes me work miracles simply running a lemonade stand that people flock to irregardless of what I charge, if it is snowing or they stand in line all goddamn day. Lemonade is my gift. Your friendship is the sugar I need to make customers come back even in the pouring rain.

Dan, I am just now reading this! I am very impressed with this piece, it's the best I've seen from you. Your emotions and feelings are strongly depicted and your friendship and concern is quite evident. I understand what you're feeling, and I know you believe me when I say that. This message about your friend, although small and quaint, is packed with all the emotion and compassionate intensity as a full chapter. Good work here! We'll hear back from her soon.