Gender Dysphoria and Pornography

Have you realized that if you type "transsexual" into any search engine you will get a lot of hookup services and pornography?

I think many do not bother, but it is strange if you are actually looking for information or a community because you feel you are different. I have been looking for ways to understand myself better, and hence I have been interested in studying the concept "transsexual" "transgender" etc. But I just find porn. "Want to fuck a transsexual?" - is the question that is addressed by commercial banners just as if thats what I am looking for. I think this illustrates that there are more horny men who type transsexual into search engines than people who actually have a personal interest in fining out things about transsexuality and of oneself.

I am starting to think that transsexuality cannot be detached from the sexualized role it has in our society. It is similar to how womanhood also is stuck in the claws of sexualization (or sexism).

Well, anyway, I fin it somethimes funny... or maybe funny is the wrong word. There is a certain bitterness to this funny-ness. Or, let's say like this: It is not funny but it makes me laugh, OK: That all the tranny ladies on sites like these are worshiped for their beauty(and you better be beautiful or you're out!) And most of us work on being beautiful. We do everything to feel happy including taking care of our looks and to be nice to people around. And the equation is simple: The hotter, the more femme you are, the more "friends" you will have and the more you will be perceived as a woman. Then men want to do all kinds of things with you including everything from casual anal-sex to marriage. Men find all the cute transsexuals and are day-dreaming while scrolling through their fabulous picture-albums. OK, this is the bitter part: While it all is a fabulous, glittery and pornoghraphically mesmerizing drag show on the surface, there is possible hell underneath it. The most sparkling queens can be conveying a mind tortured by GID (type that into your search engine if its new to you).

When the shows over, the wig is in a box, and you fall asleep smothering mascara into your pillow case - Who the f* cares about you then? (I am not bitter I am just asking, I have somebody who cares... I know)

And yes, I see the irony in posting this on a "just porn no bullshit site" ;) Maybe this is the "Bullshit". Well sorry, but I sometimes enjoy shitting in sand-castles (Maybe that idiom does not exist in the English language? But you get the joke, right...)

Rock on!
Love!

Bunz



Published by Bunzie
10 years ago
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27
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treyluv
treyluv 3 years ago
to Unresolved : I agree... Great post, by the way! :heart:
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Unresolved 5 years ago
You're a human being, so you're allowed to be sexual and have other issues that bother you too -- I understand, and I wish you well x
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Dannynn1
Hey your rite this site is about visualisation , so men look for visuals that turn them on the most. All men are different and have different tastes in regard to what turns them on visually . However on the same effect all men are different when it comes to what type of personality suits them in a friendship or relationship. So if you were to develope a relationship over the phone (verbal) and then meet ,, his visual perseption of you might be influenced by the bond you have already made and he naturally finds you more attractive because of this. 
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TheBoyIsGurl 6 years ago
djupt skrivet , men förstår dig lite jobbigt när det första man får i en chatt är ''cam bitch?
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looking4real
looking4real 7 years ago
Simply put you're an actual person not just a sexual object, I don't know how many of us get that? Still I think it's quite a lot of us that know that but it doesn't change our natures and desires and we aren't trying to change your nature so why the complaints? I may find it a bummer when I look at a trans person that's just so tasty but they don't want anything to do with men or at least men like me but it's who they are so I move on and keep looking for those do want the same things I do. I hope everyone finds what they're looking for but lets face it if 2 people aren't attracted to each other they usually won't bother looking under the surface so get used to the fact that you'll probably have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find the one that will turn into a prince. That's just life it isn't easier or harder for anyone unless they convince themselves otherwise.
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PrimarchMortarion
PrimarchMortarion 7 years ago
to Bunzie : Then I wish you good luck in your new life.
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Bunzie Publisher 7 years ago
to PrimarchMortarion : I just need to say something here but Im unsure what the right thing would be!
I can say, anyway, that since this was written I have started to live as female and watch porn very rarely, hence my absence on this website!  
xxx
Bunz
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Bunzie Publisher 7 years ago
Hello Darling! Better late than never (?) 11 months since your comment :open_mouth: Anyhow, yes - this replacement happens in many languages and it is really needed! Some languages it is hard to translate though, especially since the word "gender" doesnt exist in many languages!
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PrimarchMortarion
PrimarchMortarion 7 years ago
This is not bullshit at all. This is very heartfelt and touching. It is something I pick up and look at, being reminded of something I lost a long time ago, before crushing it and plastering the walls of my own hell with it as I march on into the infinity of (shemale) porn...
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sissysilvana 8 years ago
merci, ton article fait du bien
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aincoquin
aincoquin 8 years ago
Hello Bunzie. Je tente de comprendre votre ressenti par rapport à la manière dont les transexuelles sont vues et cataloguées à un rôle d'objet sexuel , voir méprisées. C'est parfois leur famille qui ne les accepte pas, les repousse ou les force à rester un homme". Je connais ce cas avec une trans que j'ai rencontré il y a plusieurs années. Nous avions beaucoup parlé, mais perdu de vue depuis.
Vous verrez sur mon profil (photo avec line-c) que j'apprécie les relations sexuelles avec une trans.
Je serai ravi de parler avec vous.
philippe
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Bunzie Publisher 9 years ago
I do not mind at all :smile: Im happy you get something out of my rants ! And I hear you: The only thing that kept me on this site until this day is the contacts Ive made here, some of them being dear friends in real life. BUt we have to stand a lot of dirt, and I think we also learn to make it part of our existential diet in some way. I wish more people will be couraged to express themselves in daylight. Wear dresses in the streets Girls! :wink:

Love,

Bunz
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barebackbottomfaggot
We are all different and individuals living the life we want, no one person(s) have the right to interfere, to stop, detour, or persecute an individuals their choice of lifestyle. Live free and live life your way.
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straightas 10 years ago
Funny. Well not funny, but I laughed...
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feetcd
feetcd 10 years ago
I enjoyed very much your thoughtful writing, beautifully written. And your style of thinking which shows itself more in the comments. thanks for expressing these feelings. this site gives agency to its users, and they can use it the way they want to. to add emotions, affections, feelings, desires, even love to the basis of sexual practice and explorations of that sort. After these practices the future society can come up with something new. keep pushing the barriers, love,
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yutubeslut
yutubeslut 10 years ago
our society is shallow, vulgar and obscene.
try "gender dysphoria" and you'll get more genuine results
but of course you'll also get "fuck a tranny near you."
transexualism is a big money making fetish that overshadows
true dysphoria and transgenderism.
That's just how it is.
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secret_sugar
secret_sugar 10 years ago
♥ I think you bring up some very interesting and quite valid points. And I love your honesty, directness and articulation. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, and starting a great dialog in the comments section ♥
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emilyanalslut
emilyanalslut 10 years ago
I Cross dress because I've always had a split-personality, I leave all my passive and negative traits in my male counterpart and all my positive and outgoing traits in my female side. to me it has nothing to do with a fetish, it’s just a way to express the best aspects of my personality
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Bunzie Publisher 10 years ago
to angelofdespair : I totally agree! I think what I found interesting though when I wrote this text is how male sexuality bears the authority of being a naturalized need for consumption - It is seen as "natural" how men "need" to consume women. Then we have sort of a power relation where I, who want to explore femininity, is seen as someone who wants to be consumed, used and enjoyed by men. And on the other hand I to too use this relation, I play along, since it is one tool in the social experiment where I try to understand who I am. So I agree with you, noone is free from prejudice, and noone is innocent. Im not a victim, ad the men are not perpetrators. But this the dance have a leader and a follower. And the one playing the leading role is more likely to be unaware of his(intentional choice of gender pronoune :wink: ) role. Like your comment!
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angelofdespair
angelofdespair 10 years ago
men are also viewed via sexual perspective. its not genderized in fact. in fact its kind of in our repressive sexual behavior in public, that makes us think MORE of sex instead, thats why every gender is sexualized.

just say sth nice to a women, and many of them will also think of "he just wants to fuck me". as a man, just ask for slightest body closeness thats clearly not sexual - and its perceived as suaxual by women - so: nobody is free of that.

the real problem indeed is, that words like transsexual and homosexual have that sexual in them, and thereby reduce the phenomenon to bare sexuality, but its not. its also an emotional phenomenon.

but i think its kind of "normal" in an uncontrolled media environment.

all this media, movies etc lead to several misconceptions about how men, women, humans! are. noone is left out, noone is free of prejudice, but we can reflect it and then overcome it.

but i really liked your text.
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kinkysmurf
kinkysmurf 10 years ago
OK im a man , no desire to be a woman for me , but i find femininity to be the ultimate in sexual fullness . So on the idea that men look for fem men, more in my case it is the only man id want, as i don't want to fuck myself at all and im the polar opposite.
That said based on your face pic i wouldn't leave you lying in bed crying your mascara away , all men are not heartless .
Are there manly men that want to get a sexy fuck from you and then leave , yes , this is true with all sexuality. it is in a mans nature to want to leave, men want to take all the sex they can get then leave .
I'ts what i want almost every time . the trick is something that no man will tell you about (Paul McCartney will but is-int he dead?)
and that something is love .
now Ive never been in love with a girl like u but, it seems it happens ,and if you want to be happy then it don't matter if you are green, blue ,tranny, gay, hetero,smart, stupid,tall ,short,religious,or atheist.
once you find it nourish it!
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kinkysmurf
kinkysmurf 10 years ago
im not sure how to comment, i find femininity sexy , in any way , there are some in the trans world i would build a life with sure . not all do i find attractive , and the more manly you are the less attractive i see you .
this is not meant to be mean , just my opinion . i like girly girls and it seems girls like you are a big part of it for me .
that being said , and i only have a profile pic to use here , but if you look like that i don't care about the mascara on the sheets id still take you to meet mom and dad .
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ifLower 10 years ago
Thanks, i've read this article. So, what i must to do with my sexual wishes and everyday feelings?
And who i'm? Justa pervert?
Thank you beforehand for courteous answer.
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Bunzie Publisher 10 years ago
Thank you Su you're so sweet! My wish was to bring some of the real me into this site... Im dwelling on if it is worth any. But I get some really interesting contacts by doing so, so I find that it at least to some extent is worth it :smile: Ill write more... Maybe starting a blog somewhere else if I get really productive.
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Bunzie Publisher 10 years ago
Indeed, you can be the director of your own mind and body, but you have to work on a cultural scenery which is not yours only. It is in relations to others we become who we are. And please don't read it as lamenting :smile: There are just things I find should be said. Im not bitter as long as Im learning
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fembotdck
fembotdck 10 years ago
Shitting in sand castles...yes we use that phrase lol. I agree with your post. Well-thought-out and thought-provoking. Not "bullshit"...
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Bunzie Publisher 10 years ago
And excuse the bad grammar here... just realized how hasty this was written :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:
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