The Maths of Threesomes
This is a post about math and logic and group sex. Don't expect to get your rocks off, but bonus points if you do!
I used to date a girl that was going to massage therapy school. She shared a school apartment with three other girls, and as you can imagine, helping them with their homework was pretty awesome. There was no hanky panky on the massage table; I was just there to help them practice.
Anyway, we'll call these girls GF, RM1, RM2, and RM3. RM3 was already in the apartment when the other three started at the same time, and when she moved out, RM4 moved in.
Here was the situation, romantically: RM3 had a fiance, so I never considered her romantically. I hated RM4 so much that I could barely stand to be in the same room as here. RM2 was not great friends with anybody, but I wouldn't push her out of bed, if you know what I mean. I think had I pursued it, something might have happened, but we'll never know.
That leaves GF and RM1. They both knew that I found them both attractive. One day while the three of us were driving back to their place from the mall (me driving, RM1 in the front seat, GF in the back seat), the conversation got pretty naughty. We were all fondling each other, and I was somehow managing to keep my eyes on the road. RM1 expressed to me later that she had not thought of me sexually until that drive, but as I rubbed her pussy through her pants, that had changed.
We got back to their place and continued feeling each other up. We both felt up GF through her clothes, but RM1 and I both surreptitiously excusing ourselves to the restroom at one point, just to loosen our belts enough to let somebody else's hand slide inside. She and I stroked each other under our clothes, but it ended up not going further that night.
The next day GF and I were hanging out alone in her room, and our activities from the previous night came up. I had a feeling that she might be open to a threesome with RM1 and I brought it up. She claimed that she wasn't sexually interested in girls, though RM1 later told me a story that suggests she might have been more curious than she realized. But that wasn't her issue with a threesome.
After considering it, she told me that in a threesome, there would always be one party that was left out. Maybe she was thinking of the Friends episode with Ross and his wife starting a threesome with another girl, and Ross spending the entire threesome eating a sandwich. Or maybe she was referring to the previous night, when there was clearly more energy between RM1 and me, than between her and me.
I've thought about that a lot over the years. If the three of us had ended up fucking together, would she feel left out? I've always thought that I would have given them equal attention, and I know that RM1 would have given her plenty of attention, but as far as she was consciously aware, she was far less interested in RM1's attention than mine.
This morning as I was thinking about it, here's the math that I came up with. We'll call the members A, B, and C. Gender and sexual orientation is not important to the actual equation. If it's important to you personally, feel free to assign those as appropriate.
Let's look at the situations where C is not completely involved.
If A and B focus on each other through the entire session, and C is okay with watching the whole time, then there is no problem.
If A and B focus on each other through the entire session, and C is not okay with watching the whole time, then there is a problem.
If A and B focus on each other through part of the session, and C is okay with watching for that time, and is included as much as they like, there is no problem.
If A and B focus on each other through part of the session, and C is okay with watching for some amount of time, but is not included as much as they like, there is a problem.
Basically, unless one person is always okay with watching the entire time, you run the risk of making them feel left out if the other two focus only on each other at any point in time. So these situations are probably best avoided.
In my situation, I believe that if RM1 and I focused on each other at any point in time, GF would immediately have felt left out. However, RM1 was at least as much of a perv as me, and she would have enjoyed watching at least some of the time. If she wanted to re-involve herself, she probably would have attempted to join in again. If at that point she had been rebuffed, then she would have started to feel left out.
Let's look at some more inclusive situations.
If A focuses on B and B focuses on C, then nobody is left out.
Let's say we're talking about a hetero MFF situation. A and C are female, and B is male. A riding B's cock, and C is grinding her pussy on B's face. Everyone is involved, everyone's genitals are getting attention, everybody is happy. At some point A and C switch, but the situation hasn't changed.
Let's say that both females are bisexual, or at least bi-curious. At one point C leans in and kisses A, and then they start making out. And if B's face wasn't covered in pussy and blocking his view, then it wouldn't be long before he was creaming A's pussy.
Bisexual MFF, both A and C are performing oral sex on B. Even if only one is sucking B at once, B is in heaven, and A and C are happy, so long as they both get equal time. A and C start licking B at the same time, and even when their mouths meet and they start kissing each other instead of licking B, B is probably still happy to watch. Just so long as they don't take too long before returning to him. And of course, it's awesome when B is fucking A while A is performing oral sex on C.
Porn teaches us that any given MFF situation will be bisexual, because all women are either secretly or openly sexually attracted to other women. Reality is often far different.
Hetero MMF. A and C are male, B is female. A and C are spit-roasting B, everyone is involved, everyone is happy. B is sucking A and C's cocks, alternating between the two, and A and C are probably happy, especially if B is holding both of their dicks at once. One will always be getting more attention in this situation, but he probably doesn't mind, because he knows that mouth is coming back to his dick any second now.
Bisexual MMF. A and C are male, B is female. There are so many reasons to love this one. A and C have abandoned social norms and allow themselves access to each other, as well as B. If A sucks C's dick while B sucks A's dick, then everybody is involved, everybody is happy. It gets better if they get into a triangle and A sucks B's pussy, while B sucks C's dick, while C sucks A's dick. A and C can be spit-roasting B, while making out with each other. Everybody wins! At least, so long as everybody is receiving attention from somebody else.
Porn and popular culture teach us that this is the least likely threesome. And I tend to believe that that is the reality of the situation too.
The math changes a little when there is a foursome. Regardless of gender and sexual orientation, if A and B are fucking, and C and D are fucking, then everybody is happy, even though there's more than two people, but nobody is focusing on more than one person at a time.
I would like to think that feeling left out is less likely in any given A <-> B, C <-> D situation, but this can actually complicate matters. If A and C are in a relationship, and B and D are in a relationship, and C sees that A and B seem to be having far more fun than A and C ever did, then jealously may lead to problems.
Moving to group of 5 or more is interesting, because at any given time, it's very likely that this orgy is actually a dynamic and evolving collection of twosomes and threesomes. Foursomes are also likely, especially if the orgy is bisexual, because you end up with situations like two girls licking each others' pussies while each has a guy fucking them either vaginally or anally, or one guy fucking a girl, while another guy fucks him, and another guy fucks him.
Back to the matter of threesomes. So long as each member of the group is careful to make sure that each of the others are receiving some attention, nobody will feel left out. This is easier with a bisexual or homosexual orgy than a heterosexual orgy, but even with a hetero situation, it should be okay for any member to make suggestions to any other member.
You may notice that I've left out some very important groups here including transgendered, genderqueer people. I consider myself to be pansexual, meaning what you present as or have between your legs is far less consequential to your other attributes. For convenience, it may help to think of male (M) meaning somebody with a penis and female (F) as somebody with a vagina. This is callous and offensive to some, and I apologize for that now. And if you have both... well, that's just plain awesome no matter what you present as, and I for one am jealous.
So if you find yourself in a situation where you have access to more than one other set of genitals, please make an effort to ensure that every genital that wants attention is receiving attention. I think if GF and I had had this conversation at the time, either I would have been in pussy heaven, or she would have fallen asleep from boredom a long time ago. I guess we'll never know.
I used to date a girl that was going to massage therapy school. She shared a school apartment with three other girls, and as you can imagine, helping them with their homework was pretty awesome. There was no hanky panky on the massage table; I was just there to help them practice.
Anyway, we'll call these girls GF, RM1, RM2, and RM3. RM3 was already in the apartment when the other three started at the same time, and when she moved out, RM4 moved in.
Here was the situation, romantically: RM3 had a fiance, so I never considered her romantically. I hated RM4 so much that I could barely stand to be in the same room as here. RM2 was not great friends with anybody, but I wouldn't push her out of bed, if you know what I mean. I think had I pursued it, something might have happened, but we'll never know.
That leaves GF and RM1. They both knew that I found them both attractive. One day while the three of us were driving back to their place from the mall (me driving, RM1 in the front seat, GF in the back seat), the conversation got pretty naughty. We were all fondling each other, and I was somehow managing to keep my eyes on the road. RM1 expressed to me later that she had not thought of me sexually until that drive, but as I rubbed her pussy through her pants, that had changed.
We got back to their place and continued feeling each other up. We both felt up GF through her clothes, but RM1 and I both surreptitiously excusing ourselves to the restroom at one point, just to loosen our belts enough to let somebody else's hand slide inside. She and I stroked each other under our clothes, but it ended up not going further that night.
The next day GF and I were hanging out alone in her room, and our activities from the previous night came up. I had a feeling that she might be open to a threesome with RM1 and I brought it up. She claimed that she wasn't sexually interested in girls, though RM1 later told me a story that suggests she might have been more curious than she realized. But that wasn't her issue with a threesome.
After considering it, she told me that in a threesome, there would always be one party that was left out. Maybe she was thinking of the Friends episode with Ross and his wife starting a threesome with another girl, and Ross spending the entire threesome eating a sandwich. Or maybe she was referring to the previous night, when there was clearly more energy between RM1 and me, than between her and me.
I've thought about that a lot over the years. If the three of us had ended up fucking together, would she feel left out? I've always thought that I would have given them equal attention, and I know that RM1 would have given her plenty of attention, but as far as she was consciously aware, she was far less interested in RM1's attention than mine.
This morning as I was thinking about it, here's the math that I came up with. We'll call the members A, B, and C. Gender and sexual orientation is not important to the actual equation. If it's important to you personally, feel free to assign those as appropriate.
Let's look at the situations where C is not completely involved.
If A and B focus on each other through the entire session, and C is okay with watching the whole time, then there is no problem.
If A and B focus on each other through the entire session, and C is not okay with watching the whole time, then there is a problem.
If A and B focus on each other through part of the session, and C is okay with watching for that time, and is included as much as they like, there is no problem.
If A and B focus on each other through part of the session, and C is okay with watching for some amount of time, but is not included as much as they like, there is a problem.
Basically, unless one person is always okay with watching the entire time, you run the risk of making them feel left out if the other two focus only on each other at any point in time. So these situations are probably best avoided.
In my situation, I believe that if RM1 and I focused on each other at any point in time, GF would immediately have felt left out. However, RM1 was at least as much of a perv as me, and she would have enjoyed watching at least some of the time. If she wanted to re-involve herself, she probably would have attempted to join in again. If at that point she had been rebuffed, then she would have started to feel left out.
Let's look at some more inclusive situations.
If A focuses on B and B focuses on C, then nobody is left out.
Let's say we're talking about a hetero MFF situation. A and C are female, and B is male. A riding B's cock, and C is grinding her pussy on B's face. Everyone is involved, everyone's genitals are getting attention, everybody is happy. At some point A and C switch, but the situation hasn't changed.
Let's say that both females are bisexual, or at least bi-curious. At one point C leans in and kisses A, and then they start making out. And if B's face wasn't covered in pussy and blocking his view, then it wouldn't be long before he was creaming A's pussy.
Bisexual MFF, both A and C are performing oral sex on B. Even if only one is sucking B at once, B is in heaven, and A and C are happy, so long as they both get equal time. A and C start licking B at the same time, and even when their mouths meet and they start kissing each other instead of licking B, B is probably still happy to watch. Just so long as they don't take too long before returning to him. And of course, it's awesome when B is fucking A while A is performing oral sex on C.
Porn teaches us that any given MFF situation will be bisexual, because all women are either secretly or openly sexually attracted to other women. Reality is often far different.
Hetero MMF. A and C are male, B is female. A and C are spit-roasting B, everyone is involved, everyone is happy. B is sucking A and C's cocks, alternating between the two, and A and C are probably happy, especially if B is holding both of their dicks at once. One will always be getting more attention in this situation, but he probably doesn't mind, because he knows that mouth is coming back to his dick any second now.
Bisexual MMF. A and C are male, B is female. There are so many reasons to love this one. A and C have abandoned social norms and allow themselves access to each other, as well as B. If A sucks C's dick while B sucks A's dick, then everybody is involved, everybody is happy. It gets better if they get into a triangle and A sucks B's pussy, while B sucks C's dick, while C sucks A's dick. A and C can be spit-roasting B, while making out with each other. Everybody wins! At least, so long as everybody is receiving attention from somebody else.
Porn and popular culture teach us that this is the least likely threesome. And I tend to believe that that is the reality of the situation too.
The math changes a little when there is a foursome. Regardless of gender and sexual orientation, if A and B are fucking, and C and D are fucking, then everybody is happy, even though there's more than two people, but nobody is focusing on more than one person at a time.
I would like to think that feeling left out is less likely in any given A <-> B, C <-> D situation, but this can actually complicate matters. If A and C are in a relationship, and B and D are in a relationship, and C sees that A and B seem to be having far more fun than A and C ever did, then jealously may lead to problems.
Moving to group of 5 or more is interesting, because at any given time, it's very likely that this orgy is actually a dynamic and evolving collection of twosomes and threesomes. Foursomes are also likely, especially if the orgy is bisexual, because you end up with situations like two girls licking each others' pussies while each has a guy fucking them either vaginally or anally, or one guy fucking a girl, while another guy fucks him, and another guy fucks him.
Back to the matter of threesomes. So long as each member of the group is careful to make sure that each of the others are receiving some attention, nobody will feel left out. This is easier with a bisexual or homosexual orgy than a heterosexual orgy, but even with a hetero situation, it should be okay for any member to make suggestions to any other member.
You may notice that I've left out some very important groups here including transgendered, genderqueer people. I consider myself to be pansexual, meaning what you present as or have between your legs is far less consequential to your other attributes. For convenience, it may help to think of male (M) meaning somebody with a penis and female (F) as somebody with a vagina. This is callous and offensive to some, and I apologize for that now. And if you have both... well, that's just plain awesome no matter what you present as, and I for one am jealous.
So if you find yourself in a situation where you have access to more than one other set of genitals, please make an effort to ensure that every genital that wants attention is receiving attention. I think if GF and I had had this conversation at the time, either I would have been in pussy heaven, or she would have fallen asleep from boredom a long time ago. I guess we'll never know.
6 years ago