Top 5 WORST Things About Porn
The following is a list of the top 5 worst things about the porn industry today. Let's face it: we all love porn, that's why we're here, but we also know that there are some things about porn that can annoy the fuck out of us. We've all been there; jacking off to our favorite kind of porn, really getting into it. You almost reach that point of ecstasy when something happens that turns you off or takes you out of the moment completely. This shit is really frustrating & I want to list the top 5 WORST things about porn that really turn me off. I won't be listing any specific type of porn or porn categories (such as gay, bondage, spitting, femdom, interracial, taboo, etc.) because some people may not like them, but others love them & that's fine. I want to list the problems I believe EVERYONE can agree actually suck.
#5: Bad acting.
I know what a lot of you are thinking, "They're pornstars, not actors or actresses. They're not trying to win an Oscar." I totally agree, but some acting is so horrible that it really takes me out of it. I especially can't stand loud, fake moaning & screaming. How many times have we all heard the fake "Oh, God! Oh, oh, oh! OOOhhh, Yeah! OOOHHH, SHIIIIT! OOOHHH! AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!?" I mean c'mon, at least try to sound convincing. I hate the sound of fake orgasms in porn & in the bedroom, it's so annoying! A lot of pornstars are great at convincing you that they have legit reached orgasms or maybe they did really reach it, but a lot of them are so phony that it's cringe worthy. There are some things a pornstar can say that is really sexy, but it needs to sound natural & sincere, not scripted & fake. And speaking of acting, that leads me to #4.
#4: Long boring storylines/plots.
You know, every now & then, I love a good storyline in a porn because it can help bring you into the moment & helps with the realism, as sometimes you can actually picture that certain scenario happening & imagine yourself in that situation with a hot, sexy person. Those are awesome! However, I hate long ass fucking boring storylines/plots that take so long to get to the point of porn. I have seen porn films that literally take about 15 minutes before the fucking finally begins. 15 MINUTES!!! That's the time it takes to watch a cartoon episode on TV. I don't want to wait that long to get what I came for, which is to cum. It's not a sitcom or a feature film, it's a porno. I don't care if they're good or bad at acting, just as long as I can see them fuck so I can nut, I'm good. If it takes too long to get there, I'm giving up & moving on to the next video because it's boring. Nobody wants to see pornstars try to launch an acting/writing career, which bad dialog also ties in with #4 & #5. Lesbians over thespians, at least in porn.
#3: Overly fake body parts.
I love big tits, a big ass, and thick lips as much as the next guy, but I like them to be real or at least look real. Lacey Duvalle is a great example of this. I love Lacey, always have & always will, but I loved her just as much before all the obvious implants in her tits & ass. She was already beautiful & sexy without all the fake shit injected into her, but for some reason (probably some asshole director), she felt the need to ruin herself. Don't get me wrong, she is still sexy, but just knowing it's fake now is a real turn off for me. She's definitely not the only one. There are a lot of pornstars with fake tits & asses that look great, but the OVERLY fake ones are just gross looking. Fake lips are a REAL turn off for me because they're ugly & gross looking, like they might burst at any minute. Fake boobs & asses are fine, but I'd take a girl with small tits & a slim ass over huge fake tits & asses any day. Fake lips are just a no go. Lips are my favorite part of a female's body. They're soft, wet, plump, warm & so intimate. Don't ruin them by pumping them full of shit. They look gross & it's REALLY obvious.
#2: Bad background music/noises.
This irks the fuck out of me. I love to hear the sounds of sex. Moaning, panting, groaning, queefs, the sound of flesh smacking flash, body on body, lips smacking from a kiss, spanking, booty clapping. All of these sounds turn me on, which is why I fucking hate background music. Why is this a thing? Why does porn need music at all? Sometimes the music is louder than the porno & sometimes the music is the ONLY thing you hear. I HATE that shit! I'm not here to listen to music, let alone bad music. I don't care what genre it is or even if it's good music, it has no place in a porno. Hell, even the 70s & 80s had horrible cliché music. I just never saw the point in it & I still don't. Something else that's really distracting & annoying is background noises. This occurs mostly in amateur porn, which I love because it's the real shit, but I've heard fire alarms, dogs barking, cars, airplanes, even babies crying. How can I focus on the action at hand with shit like that happening? If you make an amateur vid, please make sure you're in a quiet secure place. Trust me, it helps the vid & the vibe a lot. There is only 1 thing I hate more than these things & that's #1.
#1: Stupid bad cameramen
GOD FUCKING DAMN IT, I hate stupid bad cameramen! OK, look, it's simple: when I watch porn, I like to see the sexiest positions from the best angles. A lot of cameramen are great at capturing that perfect shot that is so sexy you want to blow your load right then & there. I commend these cameramen, but some cameramen piss me the fuck off. They switch angles as soon as the right moment is about to happen, they miss potential money shots, they talk at the most inopportune times, they pan away when you want a close up & get too close when you want a wide shot, they ruin lesbian vids by sticking their hands in the shot to touch the girls unnecessarily, they take you of the moment by continually alerting you of their presence, and so on & so forth. I cannot tell you how much a cameraman can either make or break an entire porno. They're very important, which why it pisses me off so much when they go out of their way to ruin the viewer's experience. Nobody cares that you're in a room full of hot naked people fucking, just do your damn job & do it well, which is to provide the viewer with great shots, angles, and positions that will make them love that video. Be professional, not act like a horny teenage virgin in a whorehouse. You're a PORNO cameraman, worry about the views and angles, not the action.
Now that I've got that off my chest, do you guys agree with me? What are some of the things you hate about porn the most? Please comment & let me know.
#5: Bad acting.
I know what a lot of you are thinking, "They're pornstars, not actors or actresses. They're not trying to win an Oscar." I totally agree, but some acting is so horrible that it really takes me out of it. I especially can't stand loud, fake moaning & screaming. How many times have we all heard the fake "Oh, God! Oh, oh, oh! OOOhhh, Yeah! OOOHHH, SHIIIIT! OOOHHH! AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!?" I mean c'mon, at least try to sound convincing. I hate the sound of fake orgasms in porn & in the bedroom, it's so annoying! A lot of pornstars are great at convincing you that they have legit reached orgasms or maybe they did really reach it, but a lot of them are so phony that it's cringe worthy. There are some things a pornstar can say that is really sexy, but it needs to sound natural & sincere, not scripted & fake. And speaking of acting, that leads me to #4.
#4: Long boring storylines/plots.
You know, every now & then, I love a good storyline in a porn because it can help bring you into the moment & helps with the realism, as sometimes you can actually picture that certain scenario happening & imagine yourself in that situation with a hot, sexy person. Those are awesome! However, I hate long ass fucking boring storylines/plots that take so long to get to the point of porn. I have seen porn films that literally take about 15 minutes before the fucking finally begins. 15 MINUTES!!! That's the time it takes to watch a cartoon episode on TV. I don't want to wait that long to get what I came for, which is to cum. It's not a sitcom or a feature film, it's a porno. I don't care if they're good or bad at acting, just as long as I can see them fuck so I can nut, I'm good. If it takes too long to get there, I'm giving up & moving on to the next video because it's boring. Nobody wants to see pornstars try to launch an acting/writing career, which bad dialog also ties in with #4 & #5. Lesbians over thespians, at least in porn.
#3: Overly fake body parts.
I love big tits, a big ass, and thick lips as much as the next guy, but I like them to be real or at least look real. Lacey Duvalle is a great example of this. I love Lacey, always have & always will, but I loved her just as much before all the obvious implants in her tits & ass. She was already beautiful & sexy without all the fake shit injected into her, but for some reason (probably some asshole director), she felt the need to ruin herself. Don't get me wrong, she is still sexy, but just knowing it's fake now is a real turn off for me. She's definitely not the only one. There are a lot of pornstars with fake tits & asses that look great, but the OVERLY fake ones are just gross looking. Fake lips are a REAL turn off for me because they're ugly & gross looking, like they might burst at any minute. Fake boobs & asses are fine, but I'd take a girl with small tits & a slim ass over huge fake tits & asses any day. Fake lips are just a no go. Lips are my favorite part of a female's body. They're soft, wet, plump, warm & so intimate. Don't ruin them by pumping them full of shit. They look gross & it's REALLY obvious.
#2: Bad background music/noises.
This irks the fuck out of me. I love to hear the sounds of sex. Moaning, panting, groaning, queefs, the sound of flesh smacking flash, body on body, lips smacking from a kiss, spanking, booty clapping. All of these sounds turn me on, which is why I fucking hate background music. Why is this a thing? Why does porn need music at all? Sometimes the music is louder than the porno & sometimes the music is the ONLY thing you hear. I HATE that shit! I'm not here to listen to music, let alone bad music. I don't care what genre it is or even if it's good music, it has no place in a porno. Hell, even the 70s & 80s had horrible cliché music. I just never saw the point in it & I still don't. Something else that's really distracting & annoying is background noises. This occurs mostly in amateur porn, which I love because it's the real shit, but I've heard fire alarms, dogs barking, cars, airplanes, even babies crying. How can I focus on the action at hand with shit like that happening? If you make an amateur vid, please make sure you're in a quiet secure place. Trust me, it helps the vid & the vibe a lot. There is only 1 thing I hate more than these things & that's #1.
#1: Stupid bad cameramen
GOD FUCKING DAMN IT, I hate stupid bad cameramen! OK, look, it's simple: when I watch porn, I like to see the sexiest positions from the best angles. A lot of cameramen are great at capturing that perfect shot that is so sexy you want to blow your load right then & there. I commend these cameramen, but some cameramen piss me the fuck off. They switch angles as soon as the right moment is about to happen, they miss potential money shots, they talk at the most inopportune times, they pan away when you want a close up & get too close when you want a wide shot, they ruin lesbian vids by sticking their hands in the shot to touch the girls unnecessarily, they take you of the moment by continually alerting you of their presence, and so on & so forth. I cannot tell you how much a cameraman can either make or break an entire porno. They're very important, which why it pisses me off so much when they go out of their way to ruin the viewer's experience. Nobody cares that you're in a room full of hot naked people fucking, just do your damn job & do it well, which is to provide the viewer with great shots, angles, and positions that will make them love that video. Be professional, not act like a horny teenage virgin in a whorehouse. You're a PORNO cameraman, worry about the views and angles, not the action.
Now that I've got that off my chest, do you guys agree with me? What are some of the things you hate about porn the most? Please comment & let me know.
8 years ago
