SJWs in Penisland.

It's been awhile since I've reported on the social constructs of Penisland. Primarily because my time has been split evenly between studying and masturbating. But, after a lengthy discussion with a local Penisland Shaman, I have new findings to present to the world.

See, in the real world we have social justice warriors. Those people who feel the need to fight a cause tooth and nail... as long as the fight is over the internet through mediums such as Facebook, Twitter, and message boards.

Recently, a great Penisland Shaman and Social Justice Warrior approached me about my aversion to dick avatars. Apparently I should like talking to disembodied penises.
"The penis", he exclaimed "is the most socially recognizable image in Penisland! To truly embrace our culture, you must not only accept the penis, but shower it with attention and adoration. Nay, worship would be a more appropriate choice!"

To this, I explained that while I'm not opposed to conversing with a penis, it has been my experience that a penis usually says either "hey, what's up?" or "I wanna fuck you"... or some variation thereof. So, as I prefer more meaningful conversation, I tend to gravitate towards individuals in the area that are not penises.

My explanation seemed confusing to the Penisland elder. "So, you hate all penises? Is that what you're saying?"

I explained that I didn't hate all penises; in fact, I'm quite fond of penis. But, I prefer to socialize with individuals who don't feel the need to show me their penis right away. Am I not allowed to choose who I socialize with?

"Of course you are!" he exclaimed. "You, as a modern woman, can choose to socialize with whomever you want! But, obviously, if you don't choose the penis then it means you hate penis."

So, for the better part of a week I desperately tried to explain that I didn't hate penis. I enjoy penis, I'm just not fond of talking to penis. After a grueling week of deliberation, explanation, flowcharts, slide shows, and good ol' fashioned interpretive dance, the issue was resolved to my satisfaction: I don't hate penis, he doesn't believe me, and I blocked him.

No, fellas. I don't hate your penis. But it's not very likely that I'm going to talk to you if that's the first thing I see. Your avatar should be a representation of who you are as a person. Either your face, or (if you're shy) something that lets me know what kind of person you are.

I can't dictate what you put up as your avatar. All I can tell you is this: If I see a dick, I'm going to assume you're a dick.