Top Ten Lists

The Top Ten things you don't want to hear your wife say when leaving a swinger orgy.

10. We're getting so much action that we don't need to worry about screwing each other. Not that we're missing anything there.

9. My pussy is so sore that you won't get any sex for a month.

8. Yeah, the only guy I fucked tonight is the same guy who was the only guy I fucked at the last three orgies. So?

7. That $500 imported French lingerie you bought me? I have no freaking idea where it is.

6. Head on home. I'm spending the rest of tonight here. Maybe tomorrow night, too.

5A. All this time, you thought I was only giving blowjobs?

5. You can't go with me next week. That's when I scheduled my gang bang.

4. No, I didn't make them wear condoms. Was that a problem?

3. I threw my birth control pills in the trash a month ago. You probably got me pregnant before the orgy. Probably.

2. How did you enjoy your last swinger orgy?

1. A guy I met here is taking me to Aruba for a week or two. Tell the k|ds that work sent me to a meeting, or something.