Meeting the most beautiful woman in the world

I had been chatting with Divine the most beautiful girl in the world when she informed me that her s*s ter was even more beautiful. She also told me that her sister would love to meet me, and could I come and see her.

So on a sunny winters day in Melbourne, Australia I set out for my Journey to Bucharest in Romania. Armed with a name, Alexandria a phone number and address I headed for the airport where I was to endure a 31 hr flight.

As the plane took off for the first leg to Singapore, I was seated next to a social worker, 3 hrs into the flight and still flying across aus, I wanted to jump out of the window, it reminds me, of how many social workers does it take to change a light globe… answer is one but the light globe has got to want to change… helpppppppppp !!!!!.

We landed at Singapore for a break, next part of the journey was to London about 13 hrs and now I was seated next to a screaming k**… yes you got it no sleep, but I kept thinking I was off to see the most beautiful girl in the world.
Going through all the security crap in London eventually I boarded a flight to Bucharest I was getting very excited and had noticed some very attractive Romanian girls on the flight, I was getting excited.

Landed at Bucharest and cleared customs, ok now to find a hotel I need a rest and freshen up before I meet this eastern European beauty, out of the airport I found a taxi, “în cazul în care ai de gând să?” asked the driver.... i said WTF, can you speak English? He replied ,”a little” I then asked him.
Take me to a nice hotel please.... he said ok.

He said i take you to a nice place in Mătăsari plenty of nice people there he said. We took off from the airport, the driver was old and dirty looking, the car, well that should have been on the rubbish heap years ago. We come to a green traffic light, he stopped I asked why…. Then I could see others going through a red light, what sort of place is this.

We got to Mătăsari the cabbie wanted pay I paid him and left the cab, now where the hell am I, I am tired and confused and surrounded by night clubs and the girls were so friendly, they kept asking me if I wanted sex.
I got to my hotel room. It was small and not the best, but for now it had a bed, yet I was worried cos the sheets did not look clean, I think the last person had been watching web cams there were tissues everywhere. But I got some sleep.

The next day I woke up, the area was noisy with the chitter chatter of everyday life, the people seemed somewhat very poor, I found myself a coffee, if you can call it that, next to France it’s the 2nd worst coffee in the world.
The city is typical of Europe, some parts modern some parts old, I worked my way to Alexandra’s place, I had to catch the metro.

The big moment was close, my heart was racing I called into an internet café to see if Divine was on line but she wasn’t, so I thought she might be with her beautiful s*s ter waiting for me. I got to a new suburban area then after walking down some streets, there it was…. The house, the front door where the girl of my dreams was waiting, I was very nervous, anything a patch on Divine then she will be drop dead gorgeous.

I stopped turned around and went back up the street, I need to calm down a bit and get my nerves in check… after all beauty was moments away. Ok its time I headed for the front door and knocked I waited for a moment then the door opened.

The woman at the door was …. Well you could say very large…. Well infact she was HUGE!!! And the smell… omg and the hair on the face… and she did not have her teeth in.
I froze and she said Cu ce vă pot ajuta ... yes i thought, what pot did you get out of... ok i said do you speak english, she said yes.
I said I am here to meet with Alexandria. She said you must be Wilddude (now I am telling you this is the sort of girl that when you pick her up for a date you need a forklift) i said yes, she then throw her arms around me and hugged me... OMG this cannot be, then she said them magic words.. yes I am her... at this point in time i wanted to run, the smell was killing me let alone everything else. And furthermore i so needed to talk to Divine..... how could she do this to me, she is sooooo dead.

She invited me inside, i said ok, i asked where divine was and she said she was busy with her man.
The place was messy, i could see an old computer and web cam and figured Alexandia does shows somewhere. Not wanting to stay in the smell much longer, i asked her if she would like to go out, she said yes i just have to do my hair and put my teeth in. She said she had been up all night with a guy called Ganfer.

Ok we headed out, there was a downtown place with nice cafes, but no, she wanted McDonalds so off to Micky dees we did go, after watching her devour 5 big mac large meals (and thinking this girl has her own postcode) i said, are you finished, i have since learnt that was a silly thing to say, 5 more and a ton of ice cream and we were out of there.

Lets go somewhere nice I said, she said we can catch a train to the beach, I said great and off we went, we were on the beach for a while when a policeman asked her to move, why she asked, because the tide wants to come in he replied, so she got up and wedged between her butt cheeks was a skinny man.

Walking along the beach she started to laugh (or should I say sort) what is funny I asked, she said I was the first person to take her anywhere and she was so excited that she wanted sex on the beach (dreading getting caught doing that with a beached whale and besides I could not do that) I refused, she then went on to tell me how many of her male friends like to see her feet.

She told me she was on a cam site and loved seeing the men beg for her to get naked and play with herself etc, by this stage all I wanted to do was go home. She told me how she shows them her feet for tokens and she was going to use a fan like her sister, but the fans there were not big enough.

Then she wanted to go for a naked swim…. Oh no I had fears of tidal waves and beached whales, I said sorry but not today. We left the beach and back to Bucharest, it was night time now and she was hungry again so off to Maccas again.

We then went site seeing, we went and seen Revolution Square (Piaţa Revoluţiei) , Creţulescu Palace (Palatul Creţulescu) , Palace of the Parliament (Palatul Parlamentului) , The House of the Free Press (Casa Presei Libere) , Victory Square (Piaţa Victoriei).
Then she wanted a romanic boat ride down the Dâmbovița River. I said ok but for some strange reason no boat owner wanted to take us, it had been a long day, I needed to get out of there, so i told her I had to go back to aus urgently she was a little upset, but she thought aus was around the corner and i would be back.

I dropped her off at home and made my way to the airport and got the hell out of there.

The moral of this story is simple but true, never ever believe any girl when she tells you her s*s ter is more beautiful and never ever ever ever ask Divine if you can meet someone other then her, she will get jealous lol....